Wednesday, April 27, 2011

It's A New Day

  Well, I'm caught up, kinda. I'm caught up with anything urgent. I've had breakfast, Cathys had breakfast and her medication and I've gotten things under control for myself for now. Got some music going to help with the noise. Had a friend stop by and smoked a little with me so i can even muster up a smile. I'm not gonna waste my few short hours of non misery doing dishes or laundry or any kind of house work. I hate house work. It may be sexist of me but i'm glad I'm not a woman. I'm glad I'm me in spite of all the problems I live with. I have to like being me don't I? I don't know how anyone could live if they didn't like being themselves. I don't understand how my brother can live with himself. He's always trying to be something or someone that he's not. And he doesn't care about the cost in relationships if he thinks the prize is big enough. I don't consider him as any relation any more except as my mothers only other surviving child. I have no desire to see or speak with him ever again. Well now thats not exactly true. I wouldn't mind having a honest conversation through a fence to keep temptation beyond reach but there is no way to get him to be honest. He will believe a lie almost as soon as he can speak it. He reminds me of some politicians like the one that said the statment he made on front of whatever house of congress is in wasn't ment to be factual. He was talking about funding for planed parent hood something or other and stated that 90% of their work was abortions and he knows thats a gross lie and he got called on it. And Donald Trump. More like Donald Duck. I swear I will quit admiting I'm American if we get anything like him elected president. Anything is possible I recon. Look at what we got in Florida. The guy got caught steeling millions from Florida health care and avoids prosecution by repaying it. Then he is elected govoner and almost immediately start decrees for drug testing all government employs, that will fatten his wallet at tax payer expense and, cuts aid to the poorest and most vulnerable people in the state. Typical republican health care. If you aren't rich and you get sick, please have the consideration to die quickly!! And they talked about "Obama care" having panel weather or not to pay for some treatments for dying people, they just say to everyone, if you get sick and, just hurry up and get it over with. I have mostly three kinds of people that consider themselvs republican at the street level. I also believe the same applies to upper level and elected republicans but have no direct contact with them so I can't say for sure. Anyway, they are either greedy little people like my brother that don't want regulations preventing them from doing business any way they see fit. Or they are greedy people that believe, and with good cause, that if they stay the course and make themselves noticed by the right people, they will be rewarded with lucrative jobs. Or they are young and idealistic and believe the politicians when they get up and spout philosophy to get elected and jsut turn into good lo boys doing a circle jerk and marching in step to whom ever is the top jerk at the time. i can understand some of the military people with inteligence staying in step with the party line because thats the way they are indoctronated, don't question orders, just accept that your superiors know what they are doing and carry out your mission.
  The social worker from Cathy's hospice provider came to see us. Its kinda embarassing having people come and say that someone  that provides help with Cathy was complaining about fleas when she came here. I can't get rid of her dogs. I'm not up to the up-keep on this place. I told Cathy it was a mess before I gave Robbie everything we could spare to get rid of him. I'm a firm believer in not having more than you can keep up with.  There is three times the yard to cut and he sold our riding mower we left here for Mama when we moved to Missisippi. I had things where I could cope there. We move here and find Robbie has been storing trash instead of doing anything to clean up. I spent three months cleaning out trash piles he built up. It was almost waist high inside the back part of the house and had a pile to fill a small dump truck under a tarp outside. Cathy fell out about the time I got sick of the mess and went to the hospital and that started a big mess. Some other time on that one. Don't want things I'm not ready to deal with right now.
  Anyway, she is going to see about getting someone to come in and do something about the flea problems.  Later

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