Back to suks

  Well, this morning was supposed to be a short but pleasant day at the flea market but turned out to be the usual argument about buying stuff she has no need for and no capabilities of taking care of. Plants mostly. I let her buy small shoes for her doll. I pushed her all over that place and just wore myself out as well as getting a lot of pain from my back, hips and ankle. I was just barely able to help her back into the van without falling down myself. And nothing I do is ever enough. Now I feel like shit and hurting and she is giving me problems. I have to keep in mind that no matter what happens, I love her and want what is best for her and for her to be as happy as she can in our circumstances. The alternative is not having her around and I am not going to be any better off without her no matter what goes through my mind at times. I'm gonna go lay down and straighten out my back for awhile. Later.